Emphasis On Moms     

 You are a Mom ~   You are a Wife ~   You are a Lady ~

       Don't run from who you are ~ embrace it!

The Ministry of Marriage and Motherhood ~ By Chasity Champion

    Recently my home work load, my children’s homeschooling and our family’s social responsibilities began to increase, so much so that I became overwhelmed and began to cry out to the Lord for help. He led me on a wonderful road of introspection that revealed many things that I had obligated myself to in the past months and some things that I had failed to adjust with the passing of time.  

      When I started home schooling my children and became a full time homemaker three years ago, I could glide through my days with an easy breeze under my sails and because I could-I asked the Lord to increase my capacity. PRAYER WORKS! With great power comes an even greater responsibility. So here we are 3 years later and so much has changed. My children are much older and they require more of everything it seems. I too have changed and developed several new relationships and responsibilities that begin to challenge the better part of me. Somewhere in all of this “changing” it became very obvious that without adjustments, I would soon reach my breaking point.  

      This past December marked the beautiful transition of my oldest daughter from girlhood into young womanhood when she turned 13 years old. I begin to realize that the years of shaping and molding her from the vulnerable caterpillar into a bold and beautiful butterfly were short in comparison to the time she would be an adult. One day while praying for God to help me in my responsibilities at home, he began to show me that the helper was already there and it was my daughter. It was amazing! Who knew?!  

      The Lord revealed to me that it was my responsibilities to train her to one day love her husband through ministering to his needs, to love her children through the sacrificing of her time and attention to be a servant and mother, to be a great homemaker, and also a pure and sensible woman. The charge the Lord had given me was great, but it was not one that I was incapable of fulfilling. During the last 3 years the Lord has spent a great deal of time teaching me these things so that I would be prepared to teach them to her. When Keyona turned 13, my thoughts of her were still those of a child, but in my exhaustion I quickly realized it was time for her training to begin. If I did not take this brief moment to invest in both of our lives by training her to help carry the load, she would one day lie down in exhaustion and pray to God in the same manner that I had been for months now.  

      The Bible admonishes us in Titus 2:3-5, “older women are to teach what is good, that they may encourage the younger women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be dishonored.” For the last couple years I had been working at my church as a means of fulfilling my service unto the Lord; however, a few months ago he called me to end my ministry work outside of the home to fulfill the commandment spoken of above. It was time to train my help, the one would be assist me now and one day leave me to care for her family. Keyona and my other children were the ministry opportunity I had been overlooking all the time. This call to ministry was different than all others because there was more at stake and a greater love to motivate me. Keyona’s coming of age was my opportunity to teach her the importance of servitude. In helping me, she would learn how to yield her will in order to serve those who loved and depended upon her for daily survival. She would one day be a wife and mother. Teaching her to carry the torch has turned into an instant incentive for me (instant relief) to teach not only Keyona, but all of my children more about responsibility and this would not doubt bring us all closer. It is amazing because I am able to love them so much more when I am not complaining all the time about being exhausted.  

      While this concept may sound foreign to some of you, in the 13^th chapter of John, Jesus teaches him disciples about servitude by being the ultimate servant. He washed their feet and told them to do the same. It did not matter that he was God in the flesh with all power and might in his hands, at that very moment, the greater became the lesser and taught his disciples how to display true love for the brethren by lowering himself and blessing them with clean feet. He knew the cross was before him and he took this moment to teach his disciples how to carry the crosses they would soon be given also. He was teaching them how to lay down their lives.  
 

      It is in the heart of every Christian woman to do something incredible for the Lord, but sometimes we overlook the fact that “simplistic worship” is all that he requires of us. I personally believe that the greatest way to serve the Lord for any woman if you have been blessed to be a wife or mother is to totally commit yourself to those he has entrusted to you. God did not give me a church (and I am so glad that he has not), nor has he given me a corporate career with a fancy title, but he has given me a wonderful and meaningful ministry opportunity that has the potential to change the world and it is right in my own home as a precious and cherished bride and a mother. Who could ask for anything more? 

      The ministry of marriage and motherhood is truly one of forsaking all others for the SAKE of the ones God has entrusted to you. Ladies, it is a huge responsibility. Like me, I am sure all of you had dreams you carried as children; however, I am learning with each passing day that the more that I give of myself to the ones that I love, the more God gives me to love about my life. I often joke with my family and say that I am the cook, the baker, the barber, the photographer, the doctor, the schoolteacher, most recently I became the seamstress, and so many other things; yet, with each role, I experience a pure joy within. God is also so good in allowing me brief moments to hold on to my dreams, while helping my family to develop theirs. It is a blessing I would not trade for anything in the world. At one time I felt like I was missing out on so much, but not anymore. I am not missing out on anything and somehow in his strength (Christ strength, that is), he enables me to do more than I ever thought possible. “Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine…Ephesians 3:21”  

      When he had finished washing their feet, he put on his clothes and returned to his place. “Do you understand what I have done for you?” he asked them. “You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and rightly so, for that is what I am. Now that I, your Lord and Teacher have washed your feet, you should wash one another’s feet. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. I tell you the truth, no servant is great than his masters. Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them.  John 13:12-17.  

      In closing, it is my belief that true esteem for one’s self comes through the esteeming of others and considering them to be better than ourselves. Through the sacrificing of ourselves for another person’s well being, we gain contentment, peace, and joy within; also we learn how to be truly satisfied with the life that God has given us. That is His way, the more excellent way.  
 
 

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Free To Be....

It is said that with each decade we turn, our lives our shaken up a bit. When I hit my 20s marriage and motherhood challenged me to think outside of myself and seek the well being of those who loved and depended on me. With a husband and 4 children, my life begin to take on a new meaning and even now when I look back on it all, I still did not fully understand the weight of the responsibility. 

A couple of months from now I will be hitting the big 3-0 and I noticed a change in my self-image. In a world where Botox, tummy tucks, breast implants, and hair extension are so easily accessible, it is often hard to appreciate the simplistic form of beauty I possess. Each trip to the supermarket is a reminder of our “quest to be perfect” as I am bombarded with magazines in the checkout line promising “slimmer arms, rounder butts, and less noticeable wrinkles in 14 days.” “Geez, at what point did us as women hit such a point of desperation and when did the competition become so fierce.”  I thought.  

Immediately to the story of Leah and Rachel in the Book of Genesis came to my mind and I thought surely this must have been where it all began. The Bible tells us that Leah had beautiful eyes, but Rachel was lovely in form and beautiful. For years these two women fought for the affection and love of Jacob. While Leah did not possess the beauty of her sister, she definitely had an ability to produce children which was considered a treasure for both the women and men of her day. Rachel on the other hand possessed the love of the man that Leah desperately wanted.  

Though each of these ladies had a power in their possession, it was extremely sad that they could not see it because of the feud that they had amongst each other.  Even the names of Leah’s children reflected her desire to be love by her husband and Rachel’s plea with Jacob to give her children (as if he was in control of this) demonstrates a deep brokenness within the both of them.  

At some point in life, I believe every woman fights a battle within regarding her physical appearance and social status. As I began the countdown to becoming 30, I noticed that I become obsessive about my overall image. It seems each day I was being confronted with issues about my hair, my skin, my weight and my desire to simply be a stay at home mom. At times it appeared as if the charges were endless. I began to spend days at a time on an emotional rollercoaster of happiness and heartache and the turmoil of it all began to weigh me down. One day while looking in the mirror, I had to be brutally honest with myself. If I never had the perfect hair or skin would I still be happy? If I never made the front page of Essence magazine or appeared on Oprah, could I possibly be happy? If the only people who truly appreciate my “pearls of wisdom “are the ones that I home school on a daily basis and share dinner with in the evening, would I still consider my life to be a success. The answer was “Yes!” It was at that moment that I made a choice. In spite every flaw on me or within me, I was going to LOVE ME FOR ME.  

You see I had to find the beauty in Chasity and learn to love ME and one of the most beautiful things about the story of Leah is that she learned to be the same thing. The Bible tells us those after years of battling for Jacob’s love with Rachel, when Leah gave birth to Judah she said, “I will now praise the Lord.” The name “Judah” means “praise”.  I thought that was especially beautiful. Why? First of all Leah came from a family of idol worshippers (remember Laban was looking for his household gods when he ran down Jacob), and the names of Leah’s other children all involved her desires to be loved by her husband. At some point in Leah’s life, the Lord began to speak to the brokenness within her and the physical inadequacies’ or the struggle for Jacob’s love no longer mattered. Leah decided to praise the Lord.  

I took came to a place in my journey of self-acceptance where I too had to learn how to praise the Lord. How? I referred to the makings of the old faithful Proverbs 31 woman. You know the one we all want to be but just don’t know quite how. She tells us simply put, “Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.”  When our physical beauty begins to fade, then that is the time to cultivate a beauty within that shouts praise to the Lord. For me it was learning how to be more patient and kind towards others, and also learning the art of hospitality. I also had to learn how to focus on the needs of others, instead of insignificant imperfections that no one really paid attention too.  A heart of gratitude about how and who God created me to be helped me to learn how to be content with whom I was and the stage of life that I was in. When I embraced this kind of attitude, my life and interest changed and suddenly I became a peaceful and more beautiful person. It was quite amazing. 
 

By Chasity Champion

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