Practice Makes Perfect ~ By Angie Maldonado

"Practice makes perfect".... we've all heard it, we've all said it to our kids, but have you ever applied it to your own marriage?  My four and six year old girls "practice" marriage all the time.  (Their main battle is who has to be the boy today!)  In order to get better at something, we must practice.  My six year old notices if she slacks off practicing her reading; she doesn't read as strongly as when she's consistent with practice.  I've spent the last seven months with my husband deployed.  Let's just say I haven't practiced cooking all that often... and it shows.

But, when we do practice, what happens?  We gradually improve (at least that's what my husband is hoping about my cooking).  And what happens when we practice diligently, frequently and consistently?  We greatly improve.  Once we are a little "seasoned" in our marriages, we have a tendency to forget about practice.  We sort of expect that "auto-pilot" will kick in and things will remain steady.  But, what happens when some turbulence or unexpected weather shows up?  If we've kept auto-pilot on too long, we forget how to successfully manage the unexpecteds.  Good news... you can start practicing any time! It's never too late!

We want to practice things that keep our marriages strong; that make them a light to other couples and to our children. I’ve done a little acrostic to give you some ideas of how to practice and make perfect (close to it anyway) some positive marriage skills…

Pray together. Pray for one another. Share prayer requests with each other. Become great prayer partners.

Romance each other. This one is sometimes tough for me, as I’m not a huge romantic. But, decide together what romance is for you as a couple. For me, it’s building me a bookcase, over putting rose petals in my bath. A great tool for helping you decide your “romantic flare” is Gary Chapman’s book, The Five Love Languages.

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger—Proverbs 15:1. Remember to be gentle in your speech. 

Cook. This sounds kind of silly, but I can honestly say I have never met a man who didn’t enjoy some good home cookin’! If you’re like me, you sometimes get out of practice, but start practicing. Now, I would say to try some new recipes, but that drives my man crazy. He likes our standard family recipes and not too much variation. Ask your man what he prefers and start practicing!

Take time. It’s hard in our busy lives to carve out time for each other. If you’ve read some of my other articles, you’ve heard me say that making a regular date night is so important. Just do it!

Individual relationship with Jesus Christ is essential. You want to take time for your spouse, but don’t forget to practice your relationship with the Lord, too. As you grow in Him, you become better equipped to make perfect your relationship with your mate.

Confess your mistakes and shortcomings to one another and be willing to forgive. Forgiveness is fundamental (I wish there was an ‘F’ in practice, but just remember that confession and forgiveness go hand in hand.). Forgiveness is a big one we have to practice. It’s easy to slip out of practice and let things build up. 

Exceptional! Don’t forget to strive for exceptional. Anyone can have a mundane marriage, but it takes practice to have an exceptional marriage! 

Remember, the key to “making perfect” with each of these suggestions is diligence, frequency, and consistency. May the Lord bless you on your journey to Exceptional!

~ Angie Maldonado is a home schooling mom of two girls (ages 4 and 6) and an Army wife. She and her family currently reside in Fort Benning, Georgia. Her greatest goal in life is to leave a remarkable spiritual legacy to her two girls and to see them mature with hearts to serve the Lord. She enjoys crafting, decorating, reading and of course, writing. Angie has experienced the renovating power of the Lord at work in her marriage, and considers it a great blessing to use what she has learned to help build other women in their faith. She is working on her first book dedicated to encouraging women to let their lights shine for the Lord Jesus.